Do you have a hard time meeting new people? Do you find yourself declining invitations? You could very well be shy. Shyness is when you spend too much time in your head, judging yourself, based on other people’s standards and opinions. You are constantly trying to figure out how you should be acting and behaving in various situations. You can use the following strategies to learn how to overcome shyness and become more confident in life.
Number 1 – Accept Yourself
If you are always trying to fit in, you are doing nothing more than wearing yourself out. You need to understand that not everyone will like you, and this is ok. It’s normal. Everyone experiences times of insecurity and self-consciousness. It’s not just you. If you accept yourself and your qualities, things will be much easier for you.
Number 2 – Become Self-Aware
If you want to overcome shyness and social anxiety, you need to understand that people are not looking at you. Most of them are far too busy looking at themselves. When you are around people, seek within yourself. Observe your thoughts. By simply admitting your shyness, you can reduce your anxiety, which in turn will help you relax. Once you become self-aware, you will be on your way to improvement.
Number 3 – Embrace Your Strengths
In order to gain confidence and self esteem, find something you enjoy and know you are good at. Focusing on doing this very thing, whatever it is, could help you overcome your shyness. Think about how your unique strength gives you an advantage over other people. Knowing that you possess some unique quality will boost your self-confidence. It will help you accept yourself wholeheartedly.
Number 4 – Take Care of Yourself
Taking care of yourself can totally boost your confidence! Even just small things, like: showering, flossing your teeth and keeping your nails trimmed can make a big difference in how you feel about yourself. When you add ‘dressing well’ in addition to good hygiene, you will be surprised by how much better you feel about yourself! With this increased confidence, you’ll no longer fear meeting new people and striking up conversations.
Number 5 – Practice Talking
This one is very important. If you don’t start talking to people, you’ll never stop being shy and awkward! Try to be a bit more talkative and practice talking more openly with friends, family and even complete strangers. Talk to people at bars, restaurants or wherever you are. Approach others and strike up a conversation. This will give you a chance to meet new people, and you’ll be facing your fear of talking to others.
Number 6 – Start Focusing On Others
Shy people often feel that they have to come up with amazing topics to talk about. But this is not the case. Try to focus more on others. This will help take your mind away from your shyness. People always like talking to others who seem interested in them, so ask a lot of questions and be genuinely interested. Before you know it, you’ll be so deep in conversation that you’ll completely forget about your shyness.
Number 7 – Take a Deep Breath
When you’re around new people, you feel the anxiety and it overwhelms you quickly. Next time, just excuse yourself and head over to the restroom or a quiet corner and then close your eyes and breathe. Concentrate on your breathing, and breathe in and out, slowly. Do this for a few minutes if possible. This exercise will help you relax.
Number 8 – Relax Your Muscles When Anxious
Relaxing your muscles is another great way to deal with anxious situations. You can do this by focusing on a specific part of your body. Then tighten those muscles for a few minutes, releasing slowly. Start from your toes and then move up gradually. At the same time, you can also practice deep breathing.
Number 9 – Make Eye Contact As Much As Possible
Making eye contact is one of the best confidence building activities you can do! Direct eye contact helps create a more emotional and meaningful connection. Have you ever noticed that when you are with a group, the person who is looked at the least, is the one who talks the least? The more eye contact you make, the more interested you seem. It lets the other person know that you’re interested in the conversation. This makes them feel more comfortable.
Number 10 – Focus on the Moment
When you focus on the present moment, you take your attention away from your self-consciousness. The next time you are having a conversation with someone, focus on the words they are saying. Focus closely on what they’re talking about. Focus on their tone and expressions. If you completely become absorbed by what the other person is talking about, you automatically shift your focus away from your shyness.
Number 11 – Mimic Others Interactions
If you have a hard time interacting with someone and you feel yourself getting all tense, try to mimic them. I don’t mean full out mimic every single thing they are doing, but you can mimic their posture and tone. This tends to naturally give off the vibe that you understand what they’re saying and enjoying the conversation.
Number 12 – Start Saying Yes Instead of No
Whenever you say no, you create a barrier. You’re closing all the doors. When you say no, you’re missing out on a chance to meet new people and explore new situations. Instead of always saying no to everything, give yourself a chance and start saying yes! This will allow you to be around people and socialize with others who share your interests. If you constantly put yourself around people, you will get used to it. And this will definitely help you stop being shy and quiet! By doing these self confidence tips every day, you can slowly overcome shyness and become more confident, until you can publicly display who you are – without fear of being judged.